Weather: 75 degrees, bright and sunny. No, seriously.
Field: A dust bowl, but not too bad, though I got another one of those dust tans.
Turnout: Wow! 28+ Guys out there, 4 teams, 2 games a piece. Had a nice mix of new faces (3rd Generation Players) and old faces (1st and 2nd Generation), and then of course Uncle Bobby showed up. Hopefully we can keep this turnout up as the weather turns cold and well cold.
The Arrival: Jim "Trainwreck" Connelly arrived at a fashionable 10:30a, pulling his silver jeep up into a prime parking space (do we have Valet parking at this game).
My Recollections: When I first took a look at my team, #4, I wasn't sure what to make of it, especially looking over that Team #1Juggernaut of Charlie "The Gazelle" Salem, Ross "Mr. Smooth," (someday I'm going to learn everyone's last names) and Straight Charlie, led by the venerable Dan Cipullo.
We started against team #3, mired in controversy by the suspension of John Daly for conduct detrimental to the team for his suggestion that the best gay quarterback was indeed Tony Stewart and not their stalwart leader All-Scot, who was recovering from his rib injury.
With an efficient offensive attack led by Trainwreck, an ingenious 1-4-2 defensive scheme, a ferocious pass rush from JP, some timely defense from rookie Sam, and our funnel everything to Joe (4 Ints) strategy, we had allowed only 2 first downs (and I think Jim argued them both), before calling the game at 20-0 as the first game had already ended.
After a brief rest to collect ourselves, gossip and get some gatorade or water, we went up against Team #1, who had shown their mettle against Tony Stewart's trickily led team #2. Setting an early tone (on a challenge from my teammates), I ran down on the opening kickoff with field markers in hand, and pulled "The Gazelle's" flag while simultaneously marking the field. Though Ross protested the maneuver as "so very straight," it seemed to get us on the right track.
After moving the ball steadily, a key interception doomed Dan Cipulo's opening drive, it was a theme that was be to repeated, a critical late (very pretty) interception by "New" Shane" at the goal line helped to stem Team #1's momentum -- but I'm ahead of myself.
Moving us steadily down the field, including like 10 catches on the first 12 plays to me, Jim struck first, a lead we would not relinquish. After Team #1 put their shut down corner on me, we started spreading the ball around, with some tough blocking to give Trainwreck time by JP and "New" Shane", and some good hands by the aforementioned "New Shane," Joe, and the sneaky veteran Paul, our offense moved steadily all day.
Team #1 answered back by throwing to their big play threat Charlie Salem on an out, a quick move and the Gazelle was off to the races, down the sideline, one play, one score -- 8-6. The game was [insert your cliche here --hard fought, back and forth,...] with several beautiful catches by Ross down field, man is that guy smooth, I swear I think his hair is always perfect.
We sealed the deal on a play that would have made Tony Stewart proud. A 5 yard fake like you're injured fall to the ground pass to Paul. It was dubbed a "Gay play," which I took as a compliment.
Some other observations from the games I wasn't involved in:
- A nice opening run by Milo, showing hips that would make any gay man proud.
- "Green-Bay" Matt dropping an easy TD pass (brining over his Green-Bay mojo) from All-Scott.
- Uncle Bobby showing moves that would sweep any 15 year old Asian boy off his feet running down the side-line.
Alright now its your turn....
Adam Strasberg
2 comments:
It's nice to be recognized in such a premier publication, but you can do 100 things right and then drop one pass, and that's what you'll be remembered for.
Look at Angry Matt, posting all anonymously and shit. We can tell it's you, though, because it's - well - angry... :)
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